Calico

Last weekend was my nephew's graduation. Since I stayed with my mother for the weekend and she doesn't have Internet access (she can't even work her VCR), no writing was posted last weekend. Sorry. Plus, she's been staying with me this week, leading to little writing being done by moi. Sorry, sorry. Thus, I'm posting a poem I wrote roughly two years ago. I was living in a much smaller apartment in a much smaller town. An alley dumped directly across the street from the picture window in my living room, and this mama kitty used the alley often, crying and wailing incessantly. Her plight, and my imagining living her life, inspired this work.

Calico

I hear her from a block away;
she’s crying in the alley again--
not the soft sob of a disappointment
but the despairing wail of a lifetime
scarred with broken promise.
Her life is marked by poverty—
children lost to babysnatchers,
malnutrition, abandonment, or just
the fender of a passing car.
She’s cowering near the garbage cans,
catching shelter from the rain
under a rotting eave.
Who knows where she’ll sleep tonight,
but for once I’m assured
that I won’t wake to her screams
under my window as the male
in her life takes out his pleasure.
Years ago, she was fine—
like a smoky Billie Holiday tune
or a warm brandy chaser.
She’d slink down the alley,
a purr in every step,
confident, satiated, sleek.
Each step was a symphony
of balance and grace,
seduction and purpose.
The fellas all vied for her attention.
I can only imagine the names
they called her then—
Baby, Sugarlips, Sweet Thang.
No longer.
She huddles, emaciated,
abused by the storm,
Society, the man up the street.
Her hair, where she still has it,
hangs in clumps,
dirty, snarled, mangy.
Tonight, after the storm passes,
she’ll look through my garbage,
find the shrimp I didn’t finish
and dine like a queen,
sit under the flickering streetlight,
and maybe look up at the moon
in wonder at something so beautiful.
Tomorrow or the next day,
sometime soon,
she’ll curl up in her safe place,
wrap her tail around her body,
and drift peacefully, I pray,
into the home of no yesterdays.

Stress

No poem or other creative writing this week. I'm attempting to finish projects due this week for school. Yesterday I worked all day on a lesson plan for using Second Life to teach a novel. It's still unfinished. Today, I must create a power point for my presentation tonight for my Talk in the Curriculum course (boy, will I be glad to have that finished). And so on....

I find it hard to sit at my computer where I can look outside onto my sun-drenched patio and concentrate on school work. The cardinals are calling to each other; the wrens are chirping away, and the geese meander by with a honk or two. Plus, everything is just so GREEN.

But...I have lots to do, and time is passing swiftly.

I am from...

Today would be my parents' 47th wedding anniversary. At the time of their marriage, my mother was a ticket agent for American Airlines in Nashville, and my father was a traveling salesman running from his destiny of being a minister. Both had been married before and had children. My maternal grandmother--and perhaps my snooty paternal grandmother--was not happy with Mom's involvement with Dad, so on May 6, 1961, Derby Day, Mom and Dad eloped to Kentucky. It was an inauspicious beginning. They stopped to eat on the way home, and both came down with food poisoning.

My dad loved the story of their wedding, even the illness. He'd say, "We eloped to Kentucky on Derby Day...and the race has been on ever since."

So, here's a little poem about the two greatest influences on my life.

I am from a southern magnolia,
transplanted long before my birth.
Hardier than her delicacy shows,
she yearns for that warmer soil,
but her roots are planted deep
in this Missouri dirt.
I wait patiently for her to bloom,
those sweet pastels drawing others in,
but just as the buds fully form,
a late snow shower frosts her limbs,
and she retreats in protection.

She’d like me to stay nested,
a reddened robin in her shelter,
but I am not like her.

For I am also of a drifting wind.
My father, a circuit rider,
Wandering was his soul.
He’d settle for a while,
give us time to acclimate,
gain a foothold in the arduous soil.
Then, the spirit would move us
to greener pastures,
through overgrown forests,
stopping sometimes on rocky outcroppings.
He liked the change, the challenge.
She always looked for ways to keep
her roots firmly grounded.

So, while I am from fixed beauty,
I hear a whisper in my ear say,
“Fly away, little bird. Fly!”
And as my feet lift off,
I ignore the knowing sorrow in her eyes.

Trunk life

Wednesday the Today Show had a segment on automobile tires. They said that even if never used, tires could still blow if they are six years old or older. Yikes! So, I checked my tires, and sure enough, they are six years old (there's a number right next to the rim that's four digits long, the first two digits are the week, the second two the year). So, I guess I'll add new tires to my list of money draining expenses this spring. Hooray!

Anyway, I was also reading Writing to be Read by Ken Macrorie this week for one of my seminar courses and thought I'd try a little of his advice. Originally, this poem was a series of three haiku (per Macrorie's advice), but I didn't like them. So, I switched it up. I'm still not thrilled with the piece so far, but I took a clue from Paul Valery ("A poem is never finished, only abandoned") and stopped tinkering with it. Ah, well....

Tires expire.
Of course they do
if driven 80,000 miles
with nary a rotation—
other than the obvious
round and round
to reach each destination.

Tires expire
from staying in storage
or languishing in cars’ spare vault.
They have a shelf life—
well, trunk life.

Wait, that’s untrue.
Tires don’t live.
They never toil in an office,
never hook up with others
at the local coffeehouse,
never birth a little Michelin
or a chunky Goodyear.

But if not removed from service,
replaced with a younger model,
recycled to another use,
tires will disintegrate,
even as the wheels continue revolving.

At a certain point in their career,
tires must retire.
If only that moment is recognized
and embraced entire.

spring

To continue on last week's theme--and because I haven't had time to write things other than papers for class (and those you don't want to read, trust me). I'm embedding some photos that I took this week. This is the view from my patio doors as a storm was coming in from the south. The trees have been just gorgeous!

Spring!

T.S. Eliot began his famous poem The Waste Land with "April is the cruelest month." When I taught high school, I agreed whole-heartedly as April also played host to the MAP test (Missouri's standardized test--ick). Plus, most Americans dread April because the 15th is tax day (double ick).

Today, however, the sun is shining. It's 75 degrees. I can hear cardinals calling to one another and wrens chirping right along. Even the geese with their intrusive honking don't bother me. How can anyone be uptight or glum or anything bad when a day this beautiful rolls along.

So, though I tried to take my laptop out on the patio to write a little ditty for you today. Apollo on his golden chariot was just too dang bright, making my computer screen look like a vast black hole. My friendly spider, who is still wan from winter's pale days, and I pulled out a book and read in the sun. Ah, spring!

Coupling

Sorry this is a day late (and here I am a dollar short--sorry, couldn't resist), but my sister came to visit this weekend. So, I'm a little preoccupied.

Coupling II

My breakfast is gone when
I notice honking at my patio door.
The geese that live in the complex
have made their daily migration to my abode.
They too seem to be paired,
their white-ringed necks creating hearts in mid-air,
a Hallmark greeting card just outside my door.
Geese mate for life.
Even if separated during annual migrations
they wait--sometimes years--for their partner
to return to the nest.
If one in a pair dies,
the other continues to live--
but not thrive--
for he (or she) does not re-mate.
Flocks have no singles’ groups
whereby unattached geese can find a new beau,
no ladies' night at the local pond.

Watching my flock hunt and peck
through the sparse brown grass under the elm,
I wonder...
Do some geese never find a mate?
Do some just join the thronging vee
hoping this year they'll find that lover
who makes their lives complete,
the one who gets them as none
other in the migratory pattern have?
Are there geese who watch as others find their mate
and yearly hatch their broods of goslings?
What does this single goose think
as her dark head turns grey?
Does she fear dying without notice--
alone, unmourned, easily forgotten?
Does she spend her nights yearning
the warmth of a body curled next to her
in the cold and forbidding darkness?
Does she watch each year pass
and realize the fading hope of meeting "the one"?

Holding my cup of Earl Grey between my hands,
my heart aches for that one soul
slightly apart from the rest,
hunkered, separate, not feeding.
Her bowed head swivels to observe the others.
She, unpaired, is spectator to their lives,
barely an actor within her own.